Hate Squad

The Outfoxed gals distort, fabricate, and lie: old news. They publish a despicable smear against an innocent man: news depths of degenerate depravity. Even for them. With J$P Video!

What are the requirements to be a Fox hater? Are there certain qualifications that have to be met? We wondered as we skimmed over some of the howlings from the newshounds (another fine product of the Outfoxed syndicate). If we were to go by the ravings of deborah, we'd have to say that proficiency in lying would be the key. One of her favorite fictions is to ridicule Mort Kondracke, whose function she claims is:
to make proclamations about the stories of the past week always mindful of the GOP talking points...

It's important to make this point, no matter what Mort actually said. It's then that deceitful deborah earns her nickname, as in her purported recap of their year-end program:
Dumbest Moves: John Murtha speaking out about Iraq and Democrats for the politicizing of Terry Schiavo.

Look! That right-wing GOP talking points spouter Kondracke criticized the Democrats on the Schiavo matter. See? See?!? Except that he didn't. Deb just doctored his quote. He didn't criticize Democrats, he criticized "Republicans". When caught making it up once again, the deceitful one simply leaves out "Democrats for" and fails to insert "Republicans for". All part of her modus operandi:
Nancy Pelosi was ridiculed for expressing her opinion in public.... Kondracke quipped that she managed to get all the Democratic talking points into three sentences.

Aha! Kondracke caught again! Except...[QuickTime video clip]:

How elegantly simple. Just take Barnes's opinions, claim Mort Kondracke said them, and--presto!--Kondracke becomes a conservative Republican. Sure it's dishonest, sure it's lying, but if you want to be a certified Fox hater, that's the route you take.

What other "qualities" does a Fox hater need? If one is to believe the writings of Marie-Therese, ignorance and inanity would appear to be of primary importance:
Yesterday [2-17-06] FOX & Friends devoted fully half of its three hour block to discussion and apologias for the Vice President.

Hmm. Posted at 11:18 PM, February 17. Yet Feb 17 is called "yesterday". Don't dig out your calendars. It was Feb 16. And if we wanted to be picky, we'd challenge the lie that it consumed "fully half" of the program (it amounted to less than 20%). And we might go on to cite some of the "apologias" that M-T claims filled those three hours, like:
  • Caller: It was too little, too late.
  • E.D. Hill: The Vice-President should have released a statement earlier; he should have come forward at the hospital...
  • Matthew Felling: I wanted him to have a little bit of a better story. I think yesterday's interview fell into the category of a little bit too little and too late.
  • Caller: You can't put everything on hold, including the public, and that's us.
  • Hank Sheinkopf: You have Abu Ghraib falling the same day that Chertoff gets mauled in the Congress, and now you have the Vice-President shooting someone. This is not of the norm. It shows a White house out of control.

But we won't go into that. Instead, let's focus on what M-T proclaims as a great revelation that occurred, courtesy of Fox contributor Mancow Muller:
As for Brit Hume's impartiality...Mancow goes off the GOP reservation, criticizes Cheney and admits that Hume is "one of our guys."

MULLER: What a human being doesn't do is sit with Brit Hume--sorry, you know, he's one of our guys--but you don't sit there and you don't say "Well I didn't have my press people with me"' So what?!!

Where did Mancow say anything about Hume's impartiality? He didn't. M-T made that up! The big "reveal" M-T was promoting is the shocking--shocking!--news that, like Mancow and the Fox & Friends hosts, Brit Hume also works for Fox News. Stop the presses! But the clueless one has a final parting shot:
Mancow may never be seen on FOX News again...

But that happens to be exactly what M-T wanted just a few days earlier:
Mancow, although a bore and a boor, is also dangerous.... My question is, why would FOX News give this guy a piece of its action each week?

If you agree with M-T, they'd better not take you off. If you disagree, you shouldn't be on. Even when it's the same guy both times! Don't worry, M-T is no better at playing Nostradamus than she is at understanding logic. The very next day, who was back on as usual?

M-T really shows her hand with this:
FOX News Contributor Is a Member of Wealthy, Ultra-Secret Religious Order...
[Father Jonathan] Morris, a baby-faced priest in his 30's...is a member of the Legion of Christ, an ultra-secret organization that many feel borders on being a cult.

"Many feel" is the newspoodle version of "some people say". And M-T is the newspooch version of one of Bill O'Reilly's frequently referenced "pinheads". Morris's order is so "ultra-secret" that it has an extensive web site and publishes its own magazine. But M-T is just getting warmed up, because there's nothing like an anti-Catholic bigot on a tear:
The more I learn of the depravity, collusion, corruption, toxic secrecy, favoritism, greed, pride and political machinations in the Church, the more I realize that, as a young student, I made the right decision.

She goes on to detail allegations of sexual abuse against the person who founded the Legionaries of Christ back in the 1940s. Even though these charges were investigated decades ago and the man was cleared. (Do you get why she called Father Jonathan "baby-faced" now?) Then, as icing on the cake, she permits this comment below her article:
  • why is it surprising that FOX would have a pedophile priest as a news contributor

Now the newsliars and their kennel-dwellers are accusing Father Morris himself of pedophilia! Based on absolutely nothing but sheer vitriol and contempt for who he is and what he has accomplished. And this kind of sleazy smear is defended and permitted to stand. The newsmutts have truly sunk to new, repellent depths.

Marie-Therese shows us the most important qualification of all. You can't be a Fox hater unless you are, first and foremost, a hater. She's got that part down pat.

posted: Sun - February 19, 2006 at 10:16 PM       j$p  send